When the holidays roll around, does it seem like the rest of the world is going two-by-two, in step to the beat of the "Little Drummer Boy" while you march to the tune of "Only the Lonely?" Finding yourself alone at this time of year doesn't match the pictures of holiday togetherness depicted in television commercials. But there is hope.

Being single for the holidays is like anything else in life. You have to plan for it and do some work. This holiday season, why not try making it one worth remembering? Think about the following:

*Forgive yourself

Let go of your inner critical voice that picks on everything you have ever done that did not turn out the way you hoped. Face it. You did the best you could at the time. Be kind to yourself, let go of the past, and move on. You have a whole new beginning; it starts now, so embrace it.

*Create a new holiday tradition.

Plan a ski trip, make a memorable gift for a favorite relative, or decorate something different in your home that you never have before. Find something pleasing to do that you will enjoy doing each year.

*Hold onto a good attitude.

Plan to do something with others that removes any potential for a "poor me" frame of mind. When we're single, we need to stay active versus passive. Plan a caroling party with fun people. Find a good book to read and save it for a holiday weekend. Have cider, sit around a fire with friends, and talk about your dreams for the New Year.

*Laugh.

Find your funny bone and exercise it every day. Check out movies and TV shows that consistently make you giggle, and choose friends who look on the humorous side of life. Laughing is like magic. It can open closed doors. And remember: laughing makes you more attractive.

*Forget the negative statistics.

Every day, people over 40, 50, 60, or more find happiness and get married. So do people who are overweight, bald, unfashionable, and don't look like movie stars or models.

*Make a plan for every day of the season.

Start right now. Block out your days and weeks, make preparations in advance, and make this a memorable time. Sit down with your calendar and phone book. Initiate activities you would enjoy doing by calling people close to you and talking about what you can do together. Check the schedule of events in your place of worship, your community, and your work place, and build from there.

If you do some of the above planning now; if you laugh more, get out more, and reach out to people, you may find yourself meeting more interesting people. You will also increase your chances for finding love.